Monday, September 22, 2008

The Special Mother

I'm stealing this poem from my sister. Hope you all enjoy it.
The Special Mother



by Erma Bombeck



Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice,

a few by social pressure and a couple by habit.

This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children.

Did you ever wonder how these mothers are chosen?

Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth

Selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation.

As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint, Matthew."

"Forrest, Marjorie, daughter. Patron Saint, Celia."

"Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a handicapped child."

The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a handicapped child a mother who knows no laughter?

That would be cruel."

"But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair.

Once the shock and resentment wear off she'll handle it."

"I watched her today.

She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother.

You see, the child I'm going to give her has a world of it's own.

She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."

"But Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles. "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive.

Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect.

She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied.

She will never take for granted a spoken word.

She will never consider a step ordinary.

When her child says momma for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it.

I will permit her to see clearly the things I see--ignorance, cruelty,

prejudice--and allow her to rise above them.

She will never be alone.

I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life

Because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."

"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in the air. God smiles.

"A mirror will suffice."




Friday, September 19, 2008

FFF-Hope

HOPE: To wish for something with expectation of its fulfillment..

I HOPE for so many amazing things, things that are so beyond my reach and things that are right in front of my face. So instead of posting a picture about HOPE, I'm posting a short video.

I HOPE that Rex will always protect his little sister and never let her fall.






Thursday, September 18, 2008

I am so thankful to my husband for taking the kids to school and picking me up Starbucks on his way home.

I am thankful for the progress that Faith has been making and to all the people that encourage me, guide me and support me through all of this.

I am thankful for the warm welcome I get from my children when I pick them up from school.

And most importantly, I am thankful to the Lord for blessing me with such an amazing family.




Tuesday, September 16, 2008

a 7 year olds nightmare

This morning my daughter woke up and came running into the bathroom, hugs me and starts telling me about her bad dream.

Here's how it goes:

Paris: "We were following Jack, Roc behind Jack, Ava in front of ME and ME in the back, into this big bright castle.Then we heard a voice saying "It's my castle". We all start going towards the slide, but the slide wasn't slippery. Then baby Faith was up there and I was trying to get her but then Mommy came up there and said go that way so she can get the baby, but if I go that way I can't get out. The princess voice was scary but finally I got out."

I mean really a scary Princess voice, who wouldn't be freaked out by that.






Then this morning on our way to school, I was trying to buckle Rex (2 1/2yrs) into his car seat. I jammed my finger on the buckle and said "DAMN IT", Rex then said "DAMN IT MOM". The older kids started laughing so Rex continued saying it. He thought it was so funny that he started using his "evil Damien" voice and continued repeating it. Ok, what's a Mom to do. I'm trying not to laugh and discipline him at the same time. After the older kids were dropped of at school, Rex continued saying it laughing each time. So now Rex has said his first bad word, and I'm afraid it might be one that doesn't leave us for some time. It was totally cute and funny, and so wrong.



A day in the life of the Riggio's





Monday, September 15, 2008

I'm back. I've been a little out of the loop on posting. I think I was stuck in a bubble, but I'm out now. It's amazing to me how life can be so overwhelming on so many fronts.

Nobody said raising 4 kids would be easy. Every time a new child is brought into our family, our dynamics gets thrown off and it takes awhile to get back on track. Meanwhile you wonder if you hindered the family by adding to it, yet knowing in the back of your mind that all will work out just fine, and the joys of the chaos is the reward. And yes, CHAOS is the perfect word for our household.

Then there is the world around us. We are all forced to come out of our bubble once in awhile and realize that we can not hide from tragedy, but learn and share in the sorrow. 9/11, what an incredible day. Tragedy strikes and strangers gather together as family to comfort, grieve, share ones stories. A day to remember for so many obvious reasons. BUT WHAT ABOUT THOSE DAYS WE DON'T REMEMBER. The day that a child is born with a terminal illness and fights to stay alive, or a mother is forced to choose between her life and her child's and she chooses the child's, or when a plane crashes with a mother and father aboard and four children are left behind in wonderment when there parents will return home, not knowing that life will never be the same, or when someone makes a fatal error causing the deaths of 20+ people. Theses are the days that change us for the better, however time heals and those moments are forgotten and we can't remember what made the impact that changed our lives.. I would love to never forget these moments and embed them in my memory, but then we retreat to our bubbles and time forgets.

I don't want to be in the bubble if it is going to make me forget, and I don't want to have such tragedy shake me out of the bubble.

I ask that everyone prays for the families of 9/11 victims, pray for those involved in the train crashes this passed Friday that took the lives of so many, pray for all those that suffer with decisions, hardships, and healing. We are not immune.

I find that I often, and I mean often struggle with many inner demons, yet that answer to my struggles are right there, in my prayers.

It took a weekend of relaxing on the lake, hanging out with friends for me to regroup and rid myself of those demons. the lord has blessed me with so much and I am eternally grateful.

Check out some pics of our weekend at Bass lake













Friday, September 12, 2008

FFF-Cousins

For this weeks Favorite Foto Friday we were asked to pick our own theme, so I'm choosing cousins. My kids have a lot of cousins, but there are two that are very special to one another. Faith and Joey have something in common. They both have special needs. Although their needs are very different, they both spend many hours attending weekly therapy session. Developmentally they are at about a six month old level and are working hard everyday to continue their progress. Joey and Faith are two truly amazing children.

What you lookin at.
Let's hold hands.

Yeah, yeah, yeah






Monday, September 1, 2008

A good ending to a crazy week

On of my good blogger friends put on a "Blog-licious Blog Giveaway" and guess who won. That's right folks, I'm the WINNER. I won a beautiful Mayan doll dress for Faith, now all I have to do is get the doll. Thanks Stacy. I am laughing my butt off watching the videos. I also see that you got the latest addition of Vogue. Check out Stacy and Isabella

Last night we had a break through. Well maybe not a break through, but something I've noticed lately. Going back to Faiths Gotcha Day, when Faiths foster mother handed her over to me, she came to me no problem. Well actually, she went to any one no problem. She had no attachments. Do to some of the neglect she had experienced she spent much time alone and self soothing. It was a sad time for her. Well last night we decided to take the whole family to church. It was our first time all six of us went to church together. The babies went to the daycare and Paris and Roc came to the service with Jayme and I. I got called out twice because Faith wouldn't stop crying. The second she was handed to me she stop crying and melted into me. I could cry just thinking about it. We've bonded. She finally has a sense of herself and her surroundings.She knows the difference between her family and strangers. The pediatrician said to me the other day that she has "stranger anxiety" and it's a good thing. She has come so far in the last four months. We are all so truly blessed. As for church, we have to work on that.